Where do you see yourself in five years?

It's a standard interview question, and one that doesn't seem like it should be too difficult to answer.  After all, it's entirely subjective, and can pretty easily be tailored to whatever you think your interviewer wants to hear.  Yet somehow, whenever someone poses this question to me, or even the more basic "what do you want to do?," silence, or more embarrassingly, nonsensical rambling, is the only answer I can give.  Sometimes I think it's because I don't know what I want.  Honestly though, that's not true (and it's not really that I don't want to say what I want either, though that's sometimes something I'm not great at).  I do know what I want, and I can actually articulate it pretty well...when I'm not being interviewed (or grilled by every person I meet see these days).

The truth is, I want more of Jesus.  And I think that means becoming more and more a Jesus-follower.  Experiencing more of who He is and doing more of what He does.  I think that means loving the last and the least and working on their behalf.

So where I see myself in five years is here:

Living so that Moises has a place to call home, a chance to go to school, and the freedom to always be sass central.

Living so that Gracie-girl doesn't have to be subjected to FGM and married off at an early age to a man who is not concerned with loving her and instead can go to school and make hundreds of instant friends with her sweet smile.

Living so that people like this guy can have a house that isn't sliding farther into a ditch every time it rains and have the opportunity to lift themselves out of poverty and be treated with human dignity. 

Living so that no one has to fear being trafficked or enslaved.

Living so that everyone, wherever they live, can know the love of a Savior and experience Jesus.

Sorry I don't know what that looks like for my career-path yet, but I'm working on it.

Two Thanksgivings

We got to have not one but two different Thanksgiving feasts in the last week!  Kelli and Jenna planned out a menu and figured out what we would need for an American-style Thanksgiving, and our trips to Lilongwe to extend our visas last week were timed perfectly to get all the supplies we couldn't get in Salima.  But, all the other Americans trying to celebrate Thanksgiving in Malawi had bought up all the turkeys in Lilongwe already, so we decided to wait on the American meal and on Turkey-day we ate a traditional South African meal cooked by Johan, Gerhard, and Patrick.

Lots of peeling and chopping.  Allie loves cole slaw.

Building a fire for the poike (not really sure how you spell that...).

Happy Thanksgiving y'all!

Delicious.

This weekend the search for a turkey continued and when we saw the one Gerhard found in the village we decided to pass and stick to chicken...  Don't worry though, we still had a feast.  Chicken, stuffing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, corn and apple and peach pie!

Kelli and Jenna were the Thanksgiving masterminds.

We also did a little light farming before our Thanksgiving feast.

I'm now an expert at homemade stuffing...I don't think I had actually ever made it before.

Our three little chickens.

Bean lunch anyone?

Gerhard built us an oven (and then pretended to be a tree?).

The whole feast!

Our whole Zehandi/Passport family!

Yesterday, I kept catching myself thinking "this is my life right now."  Particularly as I was dragging a bundle of elephant grass through the village and across a soccer game to the lake (that's just what happened when we went down to the village for ministry...).  How crazy is that?!  For two more weeks my life is this team and this place and then traveling to Dar Es Salaam to Amsterdam to Atlanta.  I have so so much to be thankful for: family and friends back home who love me and support me, great health on our team, a surprisingly cool day today, a beautiful view of Lake Malawi, a roof that doesn't blow away in the wind storms, and probably the best set of 13 girls you could ever ask to spend 4 months with.  So clearly we couldn't celebrate all of that with just one Thanksgiving meal.

Dear Chacos,

You were only mine for about 17 months, but you were on my feet every day for probably 8 of those months.  You went to 4 different countries with me.  I was so excited to have you re-strapped and re-soled when I got home.  I was so looking forward to keeping you forever.  And then yesterday, I walked outside to where you always were, every morning since we got to Malawi, and you were gone.  I guess the Chaco thief had big feet if he only wanted my shoes and Liza's.  Thank you for holding up through 2 months in Nicaragua, 9 weeks of camp, 3 months in East Africa, and more.  Wearing flip-flops from Wal-Mart for the next three weeks just won't be the same.

In the end though, you were just shoes.  I was am still sad you're gone, but yesterday I got to make friends with a little orphan named Hemzat and play games with the kids at the orphan care center for the day.  I got to hang out with my team and enjoy the Malawian sun for another day. Today I got to eat freaking pancakes for breakfast and have church with the Expedition Girls and our new South African friends.  In 24 hours this day will be gone.  In 2 weeks our ministry time will be over.  In less than 3 weeks I'll be back in Virginia.

As much as I’m looking forward to seeing my family and friends, eating American food, celebrating Christmas, and weather that isn’t anything like summer, I know that once this time is gone, I can’t get it back.

So Chacos, I’m heartbroken that you’re gone, but I would have lost my Chaco tan eventually anyway.  I’ll choose these moments, these days, these weeks with these people, these communities, these lives. 

And then maybe one day I’ll get new Chacos.

My last post didn't really tell you anything about Malawi, so here are some pictures to tell you a little about our time here so far.  If it seems like most of them are of pumping water, that's because that's pretty much our most constant activity (and one day I took my camera with me to get water...).  We have also been busy moving some bricks, making friends in the villages, watching some netball and football/soccer games, swimming in the lake, teaching and learning from a women's group twice a week, visiting a preschool, and learning a little bit of Chichewa.  Our team's lodging money while we're here is being used to put a roof on the Bible School here so it can open in February, so that's the last two pictures.  There's actually even more progress now, and it should be done by Friday!  The picture before those two is our house, complete with its tent additions.  I had some other pictures, but they're taking a year and a half to upload, so maybe another day...

This is Africa

I wrote most of this blog on one of our five (FIVE) travel days from Nairobi, Kenya to Senga Bay, Malawi a couple of weeks ago while our bus was stopped to fix the tire that blew out, and things have been so crazy that I haven’t gotten a chance to finish it up and post it until today.

Today is a day that I’ve had to tell myself over and over again that “this is Africa” to avoid quietly imploding.

This is Africa.

Where one day you buy bus tickets and agree to get to the station thirty minutes early to load your packs and the next day you show up and there’s no room for your packs and you get cheated out of an extra hundred thousand shillings (about 60USD) to fit them in.

Where “fitting them in” means they move a bunch of boxes from under the bus to the floor under your feet and then half of your packs still end up in the bus with you.

Where not only do the boxes on the ground in front of you make it impossible to put your feet on the ground, but the 7-foot-tall man in front of you tells you he’s “just going to lean his seat back a little bit,” leans it all the way back, and doesn’t move it for the whole ride.

Where the woman behind you pushes your seat back forward when you try to lean it back a little because she thinks you might crush her chickens.  Or maybe her chunk of raw meat that becomes the smell of everything on the bus.

Where the second 16-hour bus ride in three days becomes at 23-hour bus ride because the tire blows out three times, meaning you arrive at the border at 4am and have to wake up again at 9am.

Where your contact at the border charges you 400 dollars to take you two hours into Malawi to a place that isn’t even on a bus line.

BUT, this is Africa.

Where you can buy fresh mangos out the window of the bus every time it stops.

Where a five-year-old wakes you up on the bus to share his potato chips.

Where there are beautiful views and sometimes monkeys around every hairpin turn the bus makes.

Where the random place you get taken to is absolute paradise on Lake Malawi.

Where the owner of Hakuna Matata lodge, Willie needed you to stay the night because the amount you are paying is the exact amount that was stolen from him a week ago, and he volunteers to take you to a bus station if you only pay for fuel.

Where you finally arrive in Senga Bay and your contacts are some of the most wonderful people you’ve ever met and the Malawians make their country live up to its nickname “The Warm Heart of Africa.”

Where I share so many memories and stories of God’s goodness with such an amazing team through Kenya and Tanzania, and I know God will continue to be faithful and to stretch us all in this last month in Malawi.

After Your Heart

On our drive into Tanzania from Nairobi, I heard this song and started thinking about what it looks like to be "after [God's] heart" and "live holding nothing back."   Long-term, I really have no idea, mostly because I have very little idea what my life looks like after about December 14th.  

I'm learning more and more to be okay with that and that God is so very present in each moment that living holding nothing back most often happens on that small of a scale.

Here’s what it has looked like in our first few days in Tanzania to live holding nothing back:

Elizabeth leading an hour-long Bible study the day after we got here.

Dancing for hours in worship at a crusade.

The 14 of us worshipping in the hallway of our house with no lights on.

Patience with language barriers.

Holding things loosely (plans and possessions).

Meeting neighbors when all you want to do is sleep.

Smiles and songs in hospital wards.

Yesterday we were supposed to do ministry in the morning and then have a free afternoon.  I was looking forward to having some free time to type some things up so I wouldn’t have to do it tonight before bed.  Well, in the morning when Pastor Costa got here, he asked me and Liz if we would accompany him to a funeral of a man who belonged to the church we had worked with in the village on Friday and Saturday.  So, instead of a relaxing afternoon of resting and getting things done, the afternoon included lots of walking, riding in 3 different matatus and on a motorcycle, tons of handshaking at a funeral, and drinking more coke than anyone should ever drink in one sitting.  But, it also included a comforting touch for a wife who just lost her 28-year-old husband and a baby-girl who just lost her father, praying over the most precious mama you ever saw, seeing coffee plants, a conversation with Roo in Spanish, and a glimpse of the snowy summit of Kilimanjaro when the clouds cleared just before sunset.

We’re here for a total of 20 days.  At this point we have less than 2 weeks left.  There’s no time to hold anything back.

One week in

We're one week in and I've met my top goal of my return trip to Africa: I've already seen 3 giraffes! And many elephants (almost every morning), some baboons, and all the goats, sheep, and donkeys you could ever want to see (or live with).  Seriously though, we're living in Maasai-land, which is seriously like living in a safari.  Whenever we walk somewhere I think about how serious our safari guides in South Africa were about staying in the vehicle (but that was in a game park, where the wildlife is a lot more concentrated, and don't worry we always have Maasais with us and the animals have never been close enough to be dangerous, Mom).

Here are the basics on Maasai-land:

• When you're walking somewhere you don't know you're approaching someone's hut until it's right in front of you.
• Chai is served with breakfast and again in the afternoon, and is actually mostly goat milk and sugar in this case.
• It takes 3 or 4 hours to get from the nearest town to where we are staying when driven by the bus driver we hired from Nairobi, but only 2 hours to get out of the bush when driven by a matatu driver who drives the route regularly.
• Sometimes children are scared of white people.
• It's not good farmland, but a lot of people keep livestock (goats, sheep, donkeys, and some cattle) that they use for food and income.
• There is a bi-weekly market that comes to one of the villages that we get to experience on Wednesday.
• Matching is not something that concerns the Maasai people.

On a more serious note, our contacts and the people we're staying with are some of the most beautiful and gracious people you will ever meet.  We are doing hut-to-hut ministry, which can be frustrating because often it is difficult to build relationships that way, but the previous AIM team that was here had such an impact on our ministry hosts that they want to try emphasizing lasting relationships, so we will be trying to build on some of the relationships we started meeting people this past week.  It is so awesome to see how this partnership goes both ways and we all have something to learn from each other.

Prayer:

• Continued good health for our team
• Good attitudes as we continue to live away from civilization (electricity, running water, internet, beds, candy, etc.) for the next three weeks
• Boldness over our team as we continue to step out in faith that God's word does not return without achieving its purpose (Isaiah 55:11) and that our labor in the Lord is never in vain (1 Corinthians 15:57).
• I'm not 100% informed on the situation, but the teachers in Kenya have been on strike for better pay.  Most children were able to start classes again today, but I think it was because the government told the teachers they would lose their jobs if they didn't start teaching again and not because they were granted better salaries.  This all has to do with the elections that are coming up in March 2013, so just pray that things would be resolved peacefully and that the elections would be able to run smoothly as scheduled.
• Praise God for his goodness and faithfulness and for his provision and protection for our team.  Pray that we continue to dwell in that.

We're in the bush until the 29th, and then we'll be in Nairobi for a couple of days before we go to Tanzania, so be expecting more updates then here and on our team blog!